If there's one thing I see often during my mediumship readings or psychic readings is this: far too many people are putting up with DRAMA that they need not deal with!
Here's a tip: avoid drama like it's a plague that will kill you!
One of the best bits of advice: stop reading/watching/listening to the news… do you really need to hear about the latest murder, political screw-up, rape, fear-mongering? Ask yourself, “how does this improve my life?”
Is there someone in your life that's always negative and down, no matter how much you try to help them?
Avoid them. Walk away.
People gossiping at the office about so-and-so? Walk away.
Eliminating Drama Makes Room For A Happier Spiritual YOU
Spirit ardently wants you to live your life to the fullest: to be, do and have all you want. Spirit also wants you to be positive and VIBRANT, NOT negative and blue!
Today, more than ever, media is coming at us from all directions. We live in a terribly “noisy” world, where most of that noise is pure negativity.
Meditation can “quiet the mind,” but you need not get into the lotus position and hum to do it! You can quiet your mind by simply shutting off much of the crap that is spewing at you.
Last night, my wife and I went for dinner. Across from us was a young couple who–for the entire dinner–didn't speak, but instead were on their phones messaging others.
This couple truly missed the opportunity to be together, to enjoy the meal and to enjoy life.
Stop the drama. Start living.
What have YOU done to stop the drama in your life? Comment below!
Great article drama is overwhelming destroys relationships over and over.
I used to have FB piped in on my phone. It had push alerts that kept me “connected” to posts and updates. I deleted the ap from my phone a week ago and discovered what a distraction that activity was from my day. I enjoy FB, but now have it to scroll in the early morning or late at night, when I have already made it through my day. I agree about the news, Blair, but we do need to know what is going on around us. I think we can filter what is necessary and move on. Whenever I’m in a negative situation, with a “Debbie Downer” or perhaps become one, myself, I try to pull the silver lining out of the conversation and try to move in a different direction. Keep up your great work!!
Putting positive people around you don’t feed into peoples drama misery likes company
Very good advise. I quit watching and reading the news years ago and when I do have to deal with stress I find I am much more effective without the worlds’ stress pummeling me every day.
I absolutely agree with you. I stopped watching the news since the Yugoslawia war. Those pictures of the attrocities stayed in my head and depressed me. Esp true if you have empathy. All this negativity goes into your subconscious even if you are unaware of it. It all adds up. It is not selfishness; one has to protect oneself.
Great advice! We need to stay positive all the time.
Thanks Blair, this is so true. Even long time friends need to see this post. So tired of all the negativity and drama. A good friend but trying to distance myself from her. I tries for so long to help her see happiness is everywher. JUST open your eyes.But , you need to want it for it to happen. Thanks again Blair! Love your posts!
I stepped back from my husband’s family which causes so much drama in our lives. I was not accepted as the second wife. They are always mean and negative to me when I was around them. Then we had to let our granddaughter who is special needs go live with another family. It was so overwhelming to care for her. So much negativity attached to this little girl. It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life….but no more drama or negative interaction with both family and child.
Walking away from his family is the best thing we ever done in the 10 years we have been together. Our togetherness and love is flourishing. We are happy without the constant drama in our life.
I would love to NOT keep thinking about my ex husband…… I cry a lot
Debi, remember the fun times and remember the things you did together that made you smile. It will get better.
Debi: Been there, done that, have two t-shirts! LOL Give yourself time. There is a reason, and you may not know it yet, but there is a reason he is your ex. Thing about how you can do so many things for you…..it helps. Blessing of love and light. Barb
Maybe he’s thinking alot about you.
True Love, Real Love, lasts forever .
Sometimes, two people that the universe puts together get torn apart because of the evil that exists in the world.
Real Love has no shelf life,it never goes out of date, or gets stale.
I know of a couple that are definitely supposed to be together because you can just look at these two and know without any doubt that they are meant for each other .
They would hold hands and cuddle like a couple of school kids, they would always be able to finish each others sentences, and they were always giggling ,laughing,and smiling.
And ,even with all this going for them,one of them allowed a family member to convince them that they were destined for failure.
These two first got together when they were in their early twenties, and he never gave up on her,
for the next twenty six years he kept trying because he knew she was the one and if you asked her today if she loves him,she will probably break down crying because she Loves him so much,but a family member said she was destined to fail ,so she could never fully commit to him…
This story is one hundred percent true.
maybe one day,she will trust life enough to be happy,instead of believing in other people’s perspective on issues they know nothing of.
All I am saying is this;
If you cannot stop thinking of your EX-husband,
maybe there is a reason.
Maybe there are forces at work in this universe that have a greater idea of what is to be,better than us,and what we see.
good luck Debi.
And always remember…..FOLLOW YOUR HEART,FOR THAT IS WHERE LOVE IS.
When you involve yourself with drama it is due part that you are attracting it to you. Some need drama in their lives to *feel*. This negative energy will eventually manifest itself into psychical illnesses.
So right Blair, many people think meditation is too hard, or I tried it (entering the theta level) and I couldn’t do it.. Simply close your eyes, deep breaths, and spend quiet time within.
A quick easy way to rid yourself of low vibration energy….. Imagine a white bean of light coming from the universe, down through your head and into your entire body, visualize this is a cleansing light taking out all the negative emotions you picked up through the day as it leaves through your feet like black tar.. The intent is what matters and you will feel a whole lot lighter! Love and Light… ~Be less dis- ease ~
Thank you for this. …this was for me today.
Just stay away from negative people. You can sense it immediately. Be with people who share your beliefs and type of life you lead.This is a “ME” generation and it is poisoning the world.
I did this six years ago and speaking from experience, my life has been so much better!!!! No news to get worked up about, and the friends that i thought were friends, have been left behind still wallowing in self pity!!! Life is too short! I try daily to only find the good everywhere I go. Somedays are harder than others, but trying is the first step to achieving lifelong happiness!
Stopped watching so many crime shows. Negativity does bring you down. Makes a difference in what I watch and listen to. Thank you for this article! Nothing but love <3
Great stuff, Blair. And if the drama lives in the house and wants YOU… lock the bathroom door til you get your grip back. LOL ~ no joke for some of us.
Great reminder today. Thank you for this article! Yesterday I decided I have had enough of a friend’s drama about 50+ year old son who she continues to enable. I have done more than enough to try and help this situation. And, this morning, instead of reading the newspaper, I am finding my meditation practice is calling to me before I go to work.
Great topic Blair! I agree most of us could be a lot less stressed with all the drama we’re exposed to on a daily basis. However, I don’t agree with disconnecting from the world by not listening to or reading about the news. How are we to be a positive force if we don’t know what we’re dealing with? If we ignore what’s going on around us we risk being blind-sided by decisions others make that affect us. I think we can grow to the point that we can be exposed to the news and not spiral down into a dark cloud. Maintaining our faith, associating with positive people & taking care of our physical, emotional & spiritual well-being allows us to be part of, and not insulated from the world around us.
i removed my ex and his sick family from my life the best that i can. There is a 3 yr old (almost 4) in this mess and i do what i can for her always. and removing that sickness was the best thing for her. and i see the rewards every day. it just saddens me that her father and his family are such a negative factor in our world.
I try not to watch the news very much, or any of the magazine shows, gossip shows. I don’t read any of those magazines either. all the drama-filled FB friends are no longer. I am trying to be as positive as I can. I might be taking up yoga soon and I heard that was relaxing too.
What you said is so true.
I stopped watching the news about 4 months ago and it has made a big difference. Now I have to learn how to meditate, it is hard for me to clear my mind. Thank you for all your advice.
Yep – that is pretty good advice. I would call is stress rather than drama. Faith Hope is also correct – when she stepped away from her family drama’s – and that was a good response. Again – thanks for the Information – have a good month.
Wonderful Article with straight forward and valuable advise to eliminate negativity and let in the light! Thanks Blair!
Hi Blair: I have suffered from this a long time and being diagnosed with PTSD and depression only tends to make things worse. I am a firm believer in Mindfullness and it has had a great influence on my life. I try to practice it on a daily basis and indeed it helps me get through most of my days. You are right as well, avoiding those negative thinking people and events is essential on keeping the positive in your life.
I’ve stopped watching the news. Too much negativity there and I’m fed up with politics. Both sides of the aisle!
I’ve been trying to just focus on my kids, work and “the little things” that give me some degree of joy. Feeling much better because of it too!
Had a verrrry negative coworker (who this time last year was FINALLY let go)and it’s been nothing short of a miracle that ALL of us are much happier at work as well.
Thanks for reminding us that there’s more to life, Blair!
I agree totally, I have not watched the news or read a newspaper in years. If I have someone off loading to me their negative thoughts, I turn around to them and say there is always positive out of your negativity and point them out. When my Mum gets low and it usually over her health I always say to her what was the 5 positives of the day, she recalls them and then smiles.
I never check my phone during dinner. I keep WiFi off unless I need it – so no email or FB notifications. I turn my phone off when I go to bed and turn it back on when I get up and I ditched a really toxic friendship. My friends used to call her my “energy vampire” and my son used to tell me to let it go. I finally did and my quality of life is SO much better. I’ve also started reserving time (I actually schedule it on my calendar)for your webinars and tell my friends I’m in an online class. Still room for improvement but the breathing exercise you taught us works wonders! Thanks Blair.
Thanks Blair. How true. Great article, but then you always supply great advice.
This was for me as well… It’s a tough one – drama is EVERYWHERE! I stopped watching the news, for one. I am trying to make meditation a habit for myself. I know that it has MANY rewarding effects on our bodies and lives. But it’s tough remembering to do it daily. I’m hoping to eat healthier this year. Which, I have been, just hope that I can stick with it. I don’t watch much tv because of the nonsense. But, when I do, they are uplifting shows or movies. All too often, I hear negative things from people. Which is never good. I am going through a tough time right now (I had brain surgery in May 2012, lost my job because of it, slight depression because I can’t get a job yet, etc, etc). So, I need ALL positive things in my life. What do we do when the man or woman of the house are negative as well?? I can’t just up and leave him 🙁 – besides this, he is a GREAT man! I’ve told him to stop being negative, but he says he’s not, he’s just telling me what is likely to happen… I no longer wish to hear negativity!
I started working from home,lost “friends” who were taking all my energy from me and started working on myself and some new skills.
Thank you!! I sooo needed this today!!!
I have 3 fish tanks…Kitchen, living room, bedroom. I turn off tv. Watching the fish is so soothing. Fish = wonderful stress relief.
Such a great article to read Blair,thank you.There is so much drama now a days that it is around every corner.It’s nice to know of many things we can do to clear it from our lives…….great to hear you are feeling a lot better after your spill the other week Blair.
Thank you Blair….I have been following you since Dec. when I saw you in Ca.
Since then I have taken webinars,read your articles and you diffenitly have a
faithful follower. I love your positive,straight forward approach… And I thank you for
all the knowledge because it’s powerful,beautiful,and making you want to know more.
I am hooked! Thank you!
I agree with Tracy above. People need to know what’s going on in the country to make informed decisions at voting time. It is a right and a privilege. One does not need to go overboard, but it’s important. The local news many times is depressing and often about stories we do not need to know or can do nothing about. National news affects us all.
Tracy voices my opinion well!
I “unplugged” a while ago and I feel 95% less stress than I used to. I do not watch the news regularly as most of the time you hear it from other people anyway and I no longer let myself get sucked in to other people’s drama. I try to find a positive in everything and as far as negative people go, I tell them I do not want or need to hear their negativity and if they can’t be positive then they’ll have to go be negative somewhere else. So far so good! =:0)
I’m so tired of all the negative… I’ve been married 20 some yrs and I just can’t take it any more.
His definition of love and mine is not the same. We never do anything that I would like to do.
In fact if you asked me I wouldn’t know what do as if it doesn’t enclose his motorcyle it doesn’t happen and I don’t get a choice unless I do it by myself then I get that look or attitude!
Very sneaky and passwords that I have no idea what they are.
News all the time.. I agree, we need to be informed… But oRiley, Kelly files, Lou Dobbs, Hannity, and I know I’m missing a couple! but this is every nite. They say the same thing.
I’ve caught him cheating and don’t know how or if I can trust him anymore.
I avoid the drama when ever I can my life is far from perfect but im happy. like me deal with a lot of public on a daily bases and I hear a lot of people’s sad stories I like my glass half full instead of half empty so when people cry about the poor pity life I try to get them to look at it in a positive way .My son passed almost 3 years ago instead of looking it as a loss I think of how blessed I was for the many years I got to spend with him I miss him dearly but I have memories im so gratefull for. I confront people when I find them starting rumors and remind them as to how hurtful things can be I try to remind them that if they spend half the energy on positive things in their life instead of trying to make other people’s life miserable they could be very happy I tell them they should spend half their time based and making other people’s life miserable life and maybe surprised at how happy they could be
great topic Blair, it gave me the idea that i needed to change a few things in my life, by starting to cut back on certain friends who have nothing but a lot of drama in their life’s thank you
I stopped reading the newspaper and watching the news. Recently I had to start watching the news in the morning to know about the latest traffic problems for my 1 1/2-2 hour commute in the morning. It is TRUE. Now I remember why I stopped watching and reading the news….IT IS FILLED WITH NEGATIVITY. Granted I was clueless about current events, but I didn’t absorb the negativity from the latest crime, etc. My employment has me listening to negativity all day long. You have to self preserve. The drama is toxic and if your sensitive like me, it will bring you down. I have maps on phone that can tell me if traffic is bad, so I have learned to listen to audio books.
I have learned to avoid other people’s drama. If you must avoid them for your own health and sanity do it. Think of it as a monkey out of control in a vehicle jumping around and making noise. Let it stay in the other vehicle…not get into yours. Some people cause drama to get attention. It is like a child who doesn’t get what they want and screams, drops to the floor to pout, etc. I don’t reward bad behavior from anyone. WAlK AWAY!
I agree with you Blair 100%. I don’t even watch the weather news, lol I figure I will know how cold or warm or rainy it will be when I wake up! As for drama and other residual garbage that people can bring over to me…that does not happen anymore. My focus is on peace and being happy and grateful. Its understandable, sometimes your friends have problems, you got to listen and offer advice, but when its the same thing over and over and they have done nothing about improving their situation…well, its time to cut the cord. I have found that now becoming self ish…I take care of my self a lot better. To sit there and constantly listen to someone who is unhappy, got a bazillion problems, family issues, no money, etc. It drains me of energy. When they leave I am completely spent. No more for me. Thank You for writing about this.
I went to a get together the other night & we were 4 women. The host & I were chatting away while the other 2 were on their cell phones. After awhile they were finished & said they were tired & going home. I understand the story of the couple not speaking to one another. Not only did they miss the chance of communicating but it’s vey rude. People don’t talk TO each other any more. They text. The news is what it is, bad news & depressing. I don’t watch it anymore. I sit quietly & meditate alone away from the negativity. You give great advice. Everyone should pay attention. Meditating is when I can communicate with my deceased loved ones too. Thanks.
My Ex-Husband and I had recently started chatting again via text messages regarding monies that had to be handled for our son who is incarcerated at the present time. Things were going ok at 1st because we hadn’t talked or text in a very very long time. Things started to get twisted and misunderstood in our texting. He started to get extremely mean and belligerent towards me, putting me down as a mother! Our son is already 32 yrs old there was NO reason for my ex to bring up stuff as stupid as child support checks from over 30 years ago!!! Once he started mentioning the checks and getting meaner in his words I stopped immediately texting or replying to ANY more of his text. He continued over and over till 3:00 a.m. and I still didn’t reply which angered him more but I didn’t want to fall into his trap of making me feel so bad. I then also stopped reading the text until a couple of days when I knew they would not bother me. I had WASTED one whole day of arguing and feeling terrible about what he was saying, even had a bad night at bedtime I couldn’t sleep & I decided NO MORE I was NOT going to let him do this to me anymore! He finally stopped texting me about 4 days ago and I will NEVER fall into his trap ever again!!!!
I’ve had a lifetime of drama, but as I’ve gotten older and re-invented myself several times, it occurred to me that I just don’t have to allow negative or energy-sucking people into my life. I choose what I let in, as much as possible. Another choice I make is how much news I watch on TV. I don’t watch local news unless they are doing a feature n a topic I am interested in. I watch that feature and then go to something else.
Thank You Blair for this incredible, useful advice. I have to admit that when i am on my cell phone scrolling up and down Facebook, i end up reading a lot of disturbing news articles and they really get to me. I often find myself in tears about what is going on in our world and i Pray about it. But you are so right; I need to deactivate Facebook from my phone and stop reading the news. I am actually a very positive woman who loves peace, laughter, and so on. So again, thank you for your message to all of us. Now, i am going to take action and say goodbye to Face book on my phone, this way, i don’t read all of the negative stuff. What we don’t read won’t harm us. I think you are wonderful Blair and i am greatful for discovering you.
I was very impressed with your free webinar last night. So much so that I signed up for the 4 week webinars you offered. One thing that really surprised and encouraged me is that a lot of your guidance and advice is almost verbatim to life lessons and coping tools that I teach my clients throughout Psychotherapy sessions. I also enjoyed some of your other articles listed here on your website, specifically “How to get rid of Drama from your life!”, which is one of the most significant causes of the constant distress and anxiety in so many of my clients’ lives. I am a Licensed Social Worker, so my method and purpose is helping people heal and live healthy, happy lives is through holistic, person centered, and strengths perspective approaches, which does eventually lead to freedom and independence from psychotropic medications, overbearing parents,children,spouses,friends,siblings, etc. and the Self-Empowerment they deserve, as long as they are committed to do the work. I use some of the same concepts you discussed; Mindfulness, Becoming Motivated and Excited about exploring their own psyche and spirit guides, and using meditation to create both an inner and outer peace in their lives..
I teach my clients 3 “mantras” to say to themselves whenever they are becoming overwhelmed and eventually to avoid becoming overwhelmed in the first place. 1. “Toxic people are killing me slowly, so I must avoid them like a food allergy” (I use a food allergy scenario to demonstrate the concept of “toxic people”and help them see that if a doctor told them they would die if they ate (insert food) would they still continue to eat that food?? Probably not, so then why do you continue to “consume” these toxic people in your life. 2. NOT MY Monkeys, NOT MY Zoo (seems silly, but it is effective when they become aware of how much “other people drama” they allow themselves to get drawn into that consumes them and becomes addictive to a point when they NEED drama in their life just to feel normal, like a drug, and they become unnerved and unstable when things are calm in their life, so then they have to create drama..It’s a vicious, very avoidable cycle. and finally 3. “I can NOT control how others behave, I can ONLY control how I respond to their behavior”. This is often the hardest, most challenging skill and cognitive change anyone who has ended up on my couch (yes, I have a actual couch, in fact my office is staged like living room, not a cold, disconnected Dr.’s office) has struggled with their whole lives..
You really inspired me during last night’s webinar, and I have a feeling making the conscious choice to click that button to join your webinar, may just have been the doing of my own spirit guide. Lately, I have been feeling burned out, disenchanted, drained, and increasingly unmotivated and unsatisfied in my mental health practice. However, in less than an hour, you have renewed and invigorated he “fire in my belly” and passion to applying some of your techniques and tools for myself (as a Psychic sensitive) as well as for my clients. I just wanted to Thank you for that wonderful gift of “rejuvenation” and for getting me excited again about learning new skills. Not sure if you even realize how many others, just like me, you reached in such a brief encounter. Still wondering though, what kind of donuts are you betting for dollars??
You are an inspiration. Thank you so much for that post. And the donuts are always Boston Creme OR Double Chocolate. 🙂
If u was handy I give you one now from Tim Hortons..
Hi there you made a comment in one of your articles that stated,((“Is there someone in your life that’s always negative and down, no matter how much you try to help them? Avoid them. Walk away. My question is what if its one of youre teenagers,You just cant walk away,Im always there for them ,got them counceling, done just about everything i can to try and make that child a happy person, but doesnt seem to work and drains the life out of you with negative comments or reactions? Any advice??
I left my husband and family moved out of state 1500 miles away for 3 years then I moved back thinking I couldn’t live without them and the drama begins again do I move again out of my own home but do I make them move I’m struggling with decisions I am disabled not crippled so what do I do
This is so true. I feel like I am on a spiritual path, a sort of awakening lately and I have one person in particular that is always negative!! I think I’m empathetic because it’s as if I feel her emotions. We were really close friends and I got to the point of a meltdown…..I had to separate my social life with her even though we work together. I dearly love her but can’t handle her emotional rollercoaster. Surrounding yourself with positive people is the way to go!! oh and love your books by the way!!! Be well!!
Made my Daughter and her family move on their own ….
It’s hard to not listing to drama sometime my kids bring in the drama and don’t like to hear it and my husband always watch bad things on tv like crime and hearing who kill who I’m tired of that I always tell him shut the tv off and go to bed I love quit time and this is the only time I get it but it don’t last long if it is warm out side I go out and have my quit time. How do I tell my husband about this he thinks I’m crazy if I tell him this and he don’t believe anything I tell him what you are teaching me about our family are watching us and listing to everything we say .thank you blair !
I stopped watching the news years ago because of all the negativity! I find peace and relaxation in my crafts, or just reading a book. I actually do not watch much T.V at all, because honestly there is not much on worth watching in my opinion.
I have walked away from the majority of the drama, of coarse even though our children are grown, they always seem to have some kind of drama. I have told them, I don’t need the stress and I don’t want the drama. Call to talk to me, not to let me listen to the drama that has been created because I don’t need it, nor want it.
There is so much hate and negativity going on now days, why can’t we just love one another. Like the song by Tim McGraw, Humble and Kind, such truth in that song. I give what I can to others and help others as much as I can and I don’t do it for anything in return, I just do it because I want to and it makes me happy to make someone else happy.
I learned a few years back to eliminate the negativity in my life by not being involved with my mother in law. She is just a hateful person for no reason and it gets inside my head and makes me in a bad mood whenever I am around her. I limit my time around her to her birthday and holidays. I would like to do the same with some coworkers but can’t.
Just getting around to checking out your blog entries. I have eliminated drama from my life by doing something that, while painful as hell, was absolutely necesssry. I. O longer speak with 2 of my adult female children (one by birth, one a stepdaughter). They both THRIVE on lying and manipulating whomever can help them at the moment. When you are no longer useful to them, the lies begin. They say what they feel you want to hear and 99.9% of the time, it’s pure BS. It got to the point where no one in the family believes a word that comes out of their mouths and I got really tired of getting burned by them.
My life has dramatically improved and I no longer suffer from insomnia or anxiety. I would absolutely welcome them both back into my life if they TRULY change…until then, I pray for them each night to find peace, love and happiness.
Sounds good…& I will have a perfect partner w/out PTSD symptoms…w/out depression! I will b very content w/him…good for each other as we heal together!
One good way is to get rid of your toxic, hateful monster-in-law!
I have been working on healing
Drama is a terrible thing to have in my life. I stay away from as much as I can that causes me not to have peace. I pray alot and have a quiet time to read my Bible. I get comfort and a calming feeling. That works for me.